silence Archives - Scrum Master Toolbox Podcast

Havva Sevay: When Doing Your Best Isn’t Enough—The Scrum Master Lesson That Changed Everything

“I didn’t really acknowledge that the team is important, or what a team needs. I thought I was only focusing on getting the job done.” – Havva Sevay

When Havva took her first Scrum Master job, she knew the framework cold and she was highly motivated. So she did exactly what the framework told her to do—and failed.

Frustrated, she kept asking herself the same question: why did I fail? I really did my best. The turning point came from a mentor who asked her something she hadn’t considered: did you ever think about what the team needed? In this episode, Havva walks us through the slow, honest work of realizing she had been judging instead of listening, pushing instead of stepping back. Her mentor introduced her to active listening—writing down what people actually said, not her interpretation of it—and to the discipline of silence.

Becoming a better Scrum Master, she learned, is an everyday process that takes its time. We also explore how she stayed grounded: taking courses outside her bubble, networking, and learning from other people’s experience.

Self-reflection Question: When you face a team problem, are you observing what is actually happening, or are you already judging and rushing to the next step?

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About Havva Sevay

Havva is a people-focused organizational development expert with a Master’s in Business Administration and certification as a Scrum Master. She empowers teams and leaders through agile methodologies, modern leadership, and a strong feedback culture, fostering psychological safety and collaboration. Passionate about HR initiatives, Havva shapes people strategies, enhances employee experience, and drives inclusive, high-performing workplaces built on trust and engagement.

You can link with Havva Sevay on LinkedIn.

Mirco Gerling: The Silence Test — How to Know Your Team Doesn’t Need You Anymore

“Don’t talk too much. And only talk if it’s necessary.” – Mirco Gerling

For Mirco, success as a Scrum Master starts with a simple rule he had to fight for: don’t try to be someone else. Early in his career, when people kept saying “Mirco, you decide, you’re the Scrum Master,” he had to do the hard work of pushing back — “no, we decide together.” That instinct shapes his whole definition of success. Be authentic. Wait before you speak. Ask before you instruct. And when a discussion stalls, sit with the silence — because in most cases, someone in the team has a better idea than you do. The cleanest test of whether a team is truly self-managing? Step back.

When Mirco took two months of parental leave, his team kept running every Scrum event without him. That’s the signal. If you stop sending the sprint review invite, stop preparing the retrospective, stop nudging — and the team picks it up because they own it — your work is showing.

Self-reflection Question: What’s one thing you currently do for your team that you suspect they would do themselves if you simply stopped doing it?

Featured Retrospective Format for the Week: 1-2-4-All from Liberating Structures

Mirco’s universal tool is Liberating Structures, and within that toolbox, 1-2-4-All is his go-to. The pitch: “involve everybody, especially in large groups. And there’s nearly no preparation needed.” His proof point — facilitating a retrospective for 60 people at the Agile by Nature bar camp in just 20 minutes. The format scales from a team of five to a room of sixty without changing its shape: one minute alone, two minutes in pairs, four minutes in small groups, then a share-back with the whole group. During a 30°C COVID summer in Hamburg, Mirco even ran retros walking outdoors with his team — station to station, down to the lake for ice cream, then back. “It was a very good and constructive retrospective.” The lesson: the right structure makes you portable.

Transform Your Agile Teams with Hard-Earned Lessons from Super-Experienced Scrum Masters

About Mirco Gerling

Mirco is an experienced Scrum Master in the public sector. With a strong IT background, he has spent 25 years developing software and driving agile transformations. Passionate about innovation and teamwork, Mirco brings expertise and dedication to every project.

You can link with Mirco Gerling on LinkedIn.

Alidad Hamidi: When Silence Becomes Your Most Powerful Coaching Tool

“I purposefully designed a moment of silence. Staying in the anxiety of being silenced. Do not interrupt the team. Put the question there, let them come up with a solution. It is very hard. But very effective.” – Alidad Hamidi

Alidad walked into what seemed like a straightforward iteration manager role—what some use, instead of Scrum Master. The organization was moving servers to the cloud, a transformation with massive implications. When leadership briefed him on the team’s situation, they painted a clear picture of challenges ahead. Yet when Alidad asked the team directly about the transformation’s impact, the response was uniform: “Nothing.”

But Alidad knew better. After networking with other teams, he discovered the truth—this team maintained software generating over half a billion dollars in revenue, and the transformation would fundamentally change their work. When he asked again, silence filled the room. Not the comfortable silence of reflection, but the heavy silence of fear and mistrust. Most facilitators would have filled that void with words, reassurance, or suggestions. Alidad did something different—he waited. And waited. For what felt like an eternity, probably a full minute, he stood in that uncomfortable silence, about to leave the room.

Then something shifted. One team member picked up a pen. Then another joined in. Suddenly, the floodgates opened. Debates erupted, ideas flew, and the entire board filled with impacts and concerns. What made the difference? Before that pivotal moment, Alidad had invested in building relationships—taking the team to lunch, standing up for them when managers blamed them for support failures, showing through his actions that he genuinely cared. The team saw that he wasn’t there to tell them how to do their jobs. They started to trust that this silence wasn’t manipulation—it was genuine space for their voices. This moment taught Alidad a profound lesson about Open Systems Theory and Socio-Technical systems—sometimes the most powerful intervention is creating space and having the courage to hold it.

Self-reflection Question: When was the last time you designed a moment of silence for your team, and what held you back from making it longer?

Transform Your Agile Teams with Hard-Earned Lessons from Super-Experienced Scrum Masters

About Alidad Hamidi

Alidad is a strategic advisor in human-centred transformation, focused on organisational design for autonomy, ownership, and impact. A recovering Agility Coach, he draws on years across delivery and coaching roles to help build organisations truly fit for humans—resilient, adaptive, and designed for people, not just processes.

You can link with Alidad Hamidi on LinkedIn. You can also visit his website at desirablefutures.group.