“First they tell you their opinion. Then they start shouting, getting emotional. And the third one is silence—and resignation. That’s the worst part.” – Havva Sevay
Havva remembers a highly motivated development team working on a car configuration system so complex it began to wear them down. They asked for training.
The Product Owner waved it off—they’ve had enough training, they should understand it. What followed was a three-stage spiral Havva now recognizes anywhere: first the team shares opinions and solutions, then frustration turns to emotion and shouting, and finally comes silence and resignation. The team even kicked the Product Owner out of their daily—a low point Havva calls the worst she has seen in her career.
The turning point was a LEGO Serious Play workshop. By getting both sides to build how they wanted to work together, the Product Owner did active listening for the first time, recognized the team needed an experienced developer to guide them, and the relationship transformed. The lesson: Scrum Masters are the facilitators of those moments of coming together—and there need to be many, at every level.
Self-reflection Question: Is a team you support moving through opinion → emotion → silence right now? What moment of coming-together could you facilitate before they reach resignation?
Featured Book of the Week: The Unfair Advantage by Ash Ali and Hasan Kubba
Havva discovered The Unfair Advantage and it reshaped how she thinks about her own style as a Scrum Master. The book argues that every person has advantages others don’t—and the skill is recognizing and using them. Havva took that idea literally: she had trained in LEGO Serious Play, a method many dismiss as “for kids,” and decided to make it her unfair advantage, promoting it inside her company until even upper management asked to use it. “I got the knowledge, so I used it internally,” she says. The lesson for Scrum Masters: own your style, embrace what makes you different, and don’t be discouraged when not every team responds to it.
Transform Your Agile Teams with Hard-Earned Lessons from Super-Experienced Scrum Masters
Do you wish you had decades of experience? Learn from the Best Scrum Masters In The World, Today! The Tips from the Trenches – Scrum Master edition audiobook includes hours of audio interviews with SM’s that have decades of experience: from Mike Cohn to Linda Rising, Christopher Avery, and many more. Super-experienced Scrum Masters share their hard-earned lessons with you. Learn those today, make your teams awesome!
About Havva Sevay
Havva is a people-focused organizational development expert with a Master’s in Business Administration and certification as a Scrum Master. She empowers teams and leaders through agile methodologies, modern leadership, and a strong feedback culture, fostering psychological safety and collaboration. Passionate about HR initiatives, Havva shapes people strategies, enhances employee experience, and drives inclusive, high-performing workplaces built on trust and engagement.
You can link with Havva Sevay on LinkedIn.
